The Country Celebrant and The Country Carer

I thought that some of you might be interested in my work as a Doula. I have worked with families for a very long time; I am a Mother to three wonderful and very nearly grown-up people and I have run a pre-school in Hampshire since forever. When my Father died I wanted to honour him by burying him on his farm.  I struggled to talk to him about his wishes right until the end; I did not have the courage to raise such a personal issue. As is so often the case, events overtook us ... he was terminally ill and had made it clear to the doctors that he wanted no further intervention.  He died in his own bed with those whom he loved carrying on as best they could around him. We buried him in a clearing on the farm.  The only people present were his immediate family, a very compassionate funeral director (who happened to be my son's rugby coach) and the dogs. I knew then that I needed to learn to do this job properly and by that I don't mean the formality of being a ce...

We are lucky in Hampshire.  We have access to several natural burial grounds.  The one that I use most frequently is at East Meon.  It is set on the chalk downlands above the market town of Petersfield and there are views away towards Chichester and to the sea at Portsmouth on a clear day. To conduct a burial here is an unhurried and peaceful affair.  There is a covered space with an open fireplace and a degree of shelter for use to honour the dead.  The staff are professional yet discreet and unlike at the Crematoria there is no sense of a production line and the need to speed through the farewell. Once the goodbyes have been said and the memories shared the bereaved are able to make their way slowly through the woodland to the burial plot.  The deceased is transported on a hand cart and they are laid to rest in a hand dug grave. Families are encouraged to walk their dogs and visit their loved ones privately - there are no grave stones and so in a r...